Flip Side of Grief

OneLove

There are times in life where loss comes back-to-back to back.  This was my reality in 2004.  My uncle (more like brother) died; the next month my first grandchild died; eight months later my dad died. Seriously Lord, take me please, the grief is way too much to live through.  However instead God loved me through a beautiful human being named Charles.  In a space where grief was overwhelming God allowed me to meet a man that would forever change my life.

I have read about people meeting their true love at times of deep sadness yet I had never personally experienced it, and honestly I didn’t really believe it could happen.  November 16th 2004, I stepped into a neighborhood bar with my sister’s.  I was very reluctant to go because I had just flown 5 hours after being up for 36 hours.  I had gotten the call around 3a.m. California time that my father was dead. 

From the moment of the call I was woke and sad.  I cried until I had no tears left, I literally wept without the moisture of tears. 

My initial reaction to going out for a drink to toast dad was “No Thank You.”  My sisters were very persistent, and I finally agreed to go in for 30 minutes.  However when we arrived at the bar I changed my mind, not knowing inside of that bar was Charles, and “Divine Hook-Up” was about to happen.  Thank God for the persistence of my baby sister which got me inside for 1 drink.  Fast forward 19 years, Charles and I courted 2 years, and have been married for 17 years.  Randomly selecting a Thursday, (or so we thought) we were married November 16, 2006.  Yep, we got married 2 years later on the same date of our first encounter.

I desperately wished that my dad could have met Charles; I know he would have approved of Charles. One night I had the most vivid dream that my dad called me.  I answered the yellow phone mounted on the wall in Charles’s kitchen.  On the other end was my dad’s voice, strong, clear, and upbeat.  We talked about my life and what’s been going on.  Finally, I said dad I met a wonderful guy, he answered “I know” I said dad I think you would really like him, he said “I do”  I love you dad and he replied, “I love you too kid!” I woke up and wanted to call my dad back; then I remembered he was no longer physically here, and it had already been two years. In that moment I realized that the flip side of grief is LOVE!